sometimes my neiebor sneaks to my window and writes his name on the glass with a pudding pop. one day i caught him and threw a 6-oz carton of Van De Campps brand rice pudding at him and hit him in his shoulder blade. that mutha fukka called the law on me and i had to pay for his laundry but i got even with him he dropped his shirt off for me to have it cleaned but i didnt take it to no cleaners place i took it into my bathroom and rubbed puu puu and pee pee all over it then I folded it up, walked over to his house and force fed it to him. he choked on it and then his momma called the law on me again and now i am at the library holding the libraran hostage while the sheriff is outside with the swat team telling me to drop it and i wont get killed but i wanted to tell my story because the public defensers office doesnt try not hard enough and i think a jury would not convict me if i tells my whole side of the story