I REALLY WANT TO

My situation is strange, as I seem to be confused between reality and fantacy. I seem to have aquired a notion, over the last few months, that the sensation of having a cock in my mouth, is some thing I think I could really do, but i'm not sure why it is becoming such a strong desire, I find myself always on the internet, checking out those sights. the thought of cum shooting into my mouth and down my throat really turns me on, but the fact of not knowing whether I could actually follow through with it, makes me even more excited. The closest thing to cum i've been, is a drop or two of my own precum, and it tasted ok, but some one elses cum , have no idea. When I was a teen I attempted to self suck my own cock, but never got any closer than being able to touch the tip of my cock, but I never forgot the texture feeling of the tip, so I think maybe this desire is deeply rooted from that time, if it is, maybe satisfying my desire now could solve that desire. I often imagine running my tongue the full length of a cock shaft ,and sucking the balls into my mouth, and then licking the veiny shaft, as I raise my mouth to the cock head, and engulf the full length of his cock down my throat, and work it until he finally empties his balls of the thick white cum that I so desire.Fantacy or real time will tell I hope any ways


ps.. appreciate any suggestions even sexy ones